Its been a good couple years since I wrote on my blog. I know shame on me. My life has been kind of a whirlwind and very sporadic the past couple years. I had moved to what Sebastian called "The Emerald City" i.e, London. I was there just over a year, working in Central London and travelling frequently to the North to visit home and for makeup bookings. I loved the buzz of it initially. The feeling of being "Cosmopolitan", the diversity of people, never feeling the need to fit in or stand out. Just being unapologetically myself. The Emerald City wasn't all that I had hoped it to be and the Wizard couldn't grant my wish. I was conflicted, should I stay or should I go? After losing a close friend I found myself clicking my heels "I want to go home". Well Dorothy thank God theres Virgin Trains eh!
At first it felt great to not have to stress about work and have my family look after me. That feeling lasted a few weeks and then everything started to irritate me again. Waking up everyday in the same room, it felt like nothing had changed. Back to square one. But I had changed. That year away changed me. I soon felt the need to escape again and managed to get some interviews I never thought I would get. I almost went for it but I had to take a step back and re-evaluate. Am I falling into the same cycle? The day of one of the interviews I thought over a chat I had with Nazia (parked outside of my house in the middle of the night) she helped me realise, life isn't about escapism. You have to face things otherwise those things will never go away and I will always have these issues. I truly believe that without blessings from God and my parents I would never find peace, happiness and contentment. So I didn't go to the interview. A little bit gutted as it wasn't an easy decision. I got a text from my sister that read "Dad said YES! He's chuffed for you and said you should go!" I had been waiting for days for my sister to talk to my dad about allowing me to go for Umrah with a group (The smaller pilgrimage to Mecca). Although I've wanted to go before I never thought my dad would allow me to go without a Mahram (Male family member) but miraculously he was not only allowing me to go, but happy for me to go!
Alhamdulillah (All praise is to God) this is the right decision, I'm not supposed to be in London. Maybe one day in the future but definitely not now and so I stayed and I am home. Some things had to change though! My room desperately needed a makeover. I barely had room to move in it. I had a clear out and made the huge decision of downgrading from a double to a single.
I bought my Ottoman bed off Sleep and Dream on Facebook. The rug and pillows are from B&M. The curtains and chair are from Dunelm. I think I will use the chair for makeup clients as it is adjustable but it doesn't fit nicely under the desk so Im yet to buy a comfy desk chair.
The furniture I ordered from IKEA. It was £35 for delivery but it came very quickly. Although it was easy to assemble it took me a while to build. I'm a Pro now though! I like the minimalistic look of it.
This desk is also from IKEA, it is the IKEA MICKE desk. I decided not to get the Malme one all the make up bloggers have as it didn't have enough storage and this one was more within my budget and value for money. Im glad I went for this as I initially had not planned to get an iMac but now that I have an iMac it fits perfectly on the Micke desk. .
Downgrading my bed meant that I could get a desk and no desk is complete without an iMac.
My oil diffuser is by Asakuki which I purchased for £30 from Amazon. It is supposed to be wireless and operated through the app but I can't seem to get it to work via the wifi. Otherwise its a great little device. Very calming and definitely makes the room smell and feel better. My lamp is from IKEA also which I managed to get on sale for £6. Bargain!
I put together this collage of postcards I've collected over the years of places I've been or where others have asked me to visit. The centre of the collage is a travel Dua (prayer) card. It reads;
"How perfect He is, the One who has placed this transport at our service and we ourselves would not have been capable of that and to our Lord is our Final Destiny."
I thought it would be good to have this by my desk when my mind wonders off to wanderlust, always remembering God and the final destination.
My decision to stay put and to stop escaping was not easy. I hope to blog more of my life and that you will join me on this journey of facing all challenges while learning, developing and growing as a person and getting closer to Allah (God).
Peace & Blessings,